maybe: the story behind the lyrics

this song is good-vibes banger. a blue skies, summertime jam.

this song is as deep as it is happy.

i wrote this song to let u know this: i am capable of anything. there are many reasons why i hold such boisterous confidence. first: because i have to. without that tier of confidence, what could even i accomplish. life is too short to doubt yourself. u feel me?

“i got a spiritual feeling that maybe i can be that, and if so i want it bad”

and i have always felt that, if i only get chance at this human existence, then i won’t settle for anything less than everything. i tend to think in analogies, in symbols: life is a bullet. we choose how to shoot. where to aim it. what target to focus on. i am aiming for “the stars”

“one life inside of the chamber, i’m aiming right for the dipper”

but, sometimes, i wish i had 2 bullets. often, it feels like there isn’t enough time to do all that i can. i understand there is a bigger picture in life, but sometimes i feel that i can’t see it clearly enough.

“maybe i got 5 dreams every 4 days, wide screens but no 4k”

sometimes that’s discouraging. sometimes, it makes me feel like i might not be cut out for this.

nevertheless, i choose delusion. i choose to believe that i am capable of all. that i can be the greatest. that i can do so on my terms. that only i can limit me. that’s the energy i infused in this song. that’s the spirit behind these lyrics.

because we truly are capable of anything. not just in a romantic sense, but in real life. that’s the message of this song. and i need y’all to believe that not just about me, but about yourselves. maybe if u did, it would change ur whole life.

maybe it would lead u to happiness. to joy. toward ur inner child.

idk, maybe.

artwork by Saleem mokhiber

Brown Kid: The Story Behind The Bars

It was 2019. i had no clue what i was even doing as an artist.

I had yet to record a full song on a real microphone. Actually, I had yet to record anything outside of my phone. At the time, I was exclusively an instagram rapper. And of my most popular posts on Instagram involved a line:

“I’m the brown kid in white America, and that’s not as easy as you think”.

What was I trying to say to my followers? What did I want my audience to gain from this line?

well, I think i wanted to share this sentiment: while being Arab in this country may not be the hardest thing to deal with, it’s also not the easiest. I didn’t want to start any oppression olympics… but I was making it clear that being “brown” brings it’s own set of challenges. They weren’t extreme (for me) but they were real. undoubtedly, my “brown kid” status altered the course of my life.

Now, obviously, being “brown” doesn’t necessarily mean you are Arab. more popularly, it means you are Indian, Latino, African, etc. maybe arabs aren’t the first “brown” people that come to mind… But, proclaiming myself as the “brown kid in White America” was my way of claiming my identity unequivocally, acknowledging my hardships bluntly, and telling my story.

Well… a year later, the “brown kid” Instagram post evolved into a full song. My second song to release. it drops tonight at 12AM.

As I wrote the full song, I found myself experiencing the full range of “brown kid” emotions: pride, joy, anger, pain, and resolve. this song touches on some of the ways in which “brown”-ness feels like a disadvantageous badge of honor.

I’m excited to share this piece of me with y’all. Even if you’re not brown, you might find you relate to it. I wrote it inclusively. It’s about me, but it’s not only about me. It can be about you too. Most of us have at least 1 characteristic that renders us a minority.

So sahtein… enjoy every line if it speaks to your soul. Please let me know your thoughts. I’m proud of this song. I pray it can serve as an anthem for any “brown kid” who needs one… Regardless of skin tone, native tongue, origin, or any other visible divisible. for me, “brown” isn’t a HEX value… it’s an identity. and If it’s yours, then so too is this song.

I love y’all. Brown or otherwise.

graphic artwork by saleem mokhiber

indie artist resources

if you are an independent artist, and you just found this blog post, then i promise, you have hit the jackpot:

making money:

• http://money.futureofmusic.org/40-revenue-streams/

• https://diymusician.cdbaby.com/musician-tips/all-your-music-revenue-sources-and-how-to-collect-the-money/

• https://bandzoogle.com/blog/18-ways-musicians-can-make-money

release strategies:

• https://www.musicconnection.com/music-industry-advice-26-things-release-song-album/

• https://artofamanager.com/2018/06/50-ways-to-promote-a-single/

Making music:

• http://logicpro.skydocu.com/en/record-your-voice-or-a-musical-instrument/comp-your-audio-recordings/comping-overview/

songwriting:

• https://wordmaker.info/starting-ending/g-atic.html

pitching to blogs:

• https://www.tunecore.com/guides/pitching-your-music-101

• https://www.musicindustryhowto.com/pitching-music-to-blogs-how-to-really-get-your-music-featured/

• https://www.thefader.com/2017/04/12/how-to-pitch-music-to-blogs

• https://www.bmi.com/news/entry/the-dos-and-donts-of-following-up-on-your-songs

• https://www.hypebot.com/hypebot/2018/06/what-not-to-do-when-pitching-your-music-to-press-outlets-1.html

• http://www.musicthinktank.com/blog/how-to-write-an-e-mail-pitch-that-gets-your-music-heard.html

seven things i wanna learn

1. a backflip.

   • from what i’ve been told, there’s nothing to it but un-inhibiting your mind and learning the form. in other words, if you’re not a bitch, and you’re in decent shape, it’s something you can do. this is number ONE on my list, but this list is not in order of importance.

2. dance.

   • i’ve always been unsure how to dance with any particular style or form. this is likely because i’m unaware of how i use my body lol. this is a common theme for me. i’m unaware of the way that I pronate when i walk, my posture, the way i chew when i eat. so it’s unsurprising that dancing isn’t intuitive for me. i still want to learn it, or at least have basic proficiency.

3. ride a skateboard.

   • much like back-flipping, this requires me to overcome fear of injury. i tried my hand at this in 2019, even got a board and practiced a few times. i have become comfortable cruising around on very leveled surfaces, but nothing out of my comfort zone yet. this will be a painful, yet worthwhile journey. i need to get to the point where i could go to a skatepark and not stand out. that would be enough for me… (you could toss surfing in as a related add-on).

4. speak arabic.

   • if i’m gonna teach it to my kids, i’ve gotta know it first. simple as that.

5. perform before audiences.

   • again, un-inhibition is key. i have all the talent and charisma for this. just haven’t broken the seal. i feel that once i finally do, it will be game over. i’m awaiting the avalanche anxiously.

6. stand up comedy.

   • i know i’m a funny dude. i’ve always had the ability to bring a room of people to belly laughter. but the thought of structuring a prepared skit for people who don’t know me is extremely intimidating. the fear of failure creeps in here. what if I bombed, what would that do to my psyche, how would it linger in my mind. that sort of hypothetical fear has kept this as a back burner goal for me mentally. but I know that one day, i will try it & hopefully perform with some regularity.

7. play an instrument.

   • either guitar or piano. this is vital to me coming to understand music theory and the background of the creation process. i’m not a musician. i’m an artist and a lyricist… learning an instrument will birth me into musicianship. this will allow me to have 10x more authorship over my sound. it will definitely help in the production of my music. that is unspeakably important to me. this is perhaps the most important “thing to learn” on this list, at present.

honorable mentions: professional level photography, drive a stick, harvest produce, and lucid dream.

morning affirmations

i’m gonna write my daily affirmations in this blog

feel free to use these affirmations as your own. it’s vital to start every day by fostering good vibes & positivity. the act of speaking is powerful, i wanna speak my power into existence.

some examples:

1. i am powerful

2. i am accomplishing my goals day by day

3. i will incorporate more structure in my daily life, to be more effective and efficient

4. i am listening to my heart

you get the idea… anyways more affirmations to come tomorrow.

social media detox

i went on a social media detox this week.

i wanted to start my 2020 with 20/20. no screens, no comments, no likes, none of that shit. here’s what i discovered while fasting from social media during the first week of this year:

1. strangely enough, i didn’t miss social media:

   i genuinely did not crave the fun. there was no FOMO. if anything, i felt relieved to not be so active on instagram and tiktok. the thing is, when i go on social platforms, it’s work. because I am using those apps to showcase my music and grow a following… it’s my business. i love it & every day that i use those apps, i get closer to my dreams becoming realities… but it’s work… in my perfect world, i wouldn’t need social media. but i do. being active on social networks is the cost of business in this digital age. it’s the new happy hour, the new networker, the new open mic. making sure you are exposed on these apps is how you build your name as an artist. but that being said, i did not miss the hustle and bustle of social media for the entirety of the week. it was a nice break. it allowed me to recalibrate.

2. i realized how afraid I am:

   a crippling and lingering sense ear was the reason i needed to recalibrate. before taking a break, i was forcing content. i was enslaving myself to get videos ready on a regular basis. i was never ahead of schedule, always on the grind.

   i had subconscious thoughts of… “what will happen to me as an upcoming artist if i don’t post enough?” will I lose my followers? will my account not perform as well? will Instagram screw me in it’s ever-amorphous algorithm? these questions caused me to create with the fire of fear lit under my ass.

   when i took a week off, the fear faded. i stated to realize that it was okay if i didn’t post. i would be fine either way. i began writing lyrics because i felt them, because i wanted to. they were much better. fear produces force. desire produces dreams.

3. i still used my phone just as much:

   turns out that we are addicted to the device, not the apps. at least, myself. my screen-time was basically identical to my averages. this tells me that, as addictive as instagram and tiktok are… our deepest rooted addiction is escaping into our phones. so, i couldn’t use social media… i can text more, i can check ESPN and read about my teams, i can film more videos and edit them more intensely. this was reassuring, oddly enough. because it helped me understand that, perhaps, what i really need is to leave my phone out of sight regularly, to really, truly detox.

4. finally, being structured matters:

   before my detox, i was winging it. my plans was this: i would just work on instagram til i’m done or tired, then i’ll work on tiktok til exhaustion, then i’ll write, then i’ll record. well… the problem is, i never get past step 1. i would work super hard for an indefinite amount of time on instagram, & then get so tired and drained, that i would have no energy left for other areas of my job. it was awful for business. so now, i am introducing time limits. 2 hours on Instagram (say 11AM-1PM), then 1 hour of reading (say 130PM to 230PM), then something else productive. this should allow me to get everything done, without burnout, and with clarity… i hope.

anyways, those are the 4 major takeaways from my detox. i hope they shed some light or offer some clarity to you in your own life. 10/10 would recommend you try it out. even just for a day.

welcome to the blog

welcome to my website

i’m an indie rapper whose been at it for exactly 1 year now. i’m working on my first mixtape, & i’ve been posting a lot on IG. anyways, i’m here to fuck shit up & make waves. if u rock w my sound & the bars, then let’s get it homies.